Tommy's other mommies

Back when I was pregnant with Lexi people would ask me "what does Stasa think about having a new baby?" and I would always answer that she really didn't "get" it. We would talk about it with her and explain that there was a baby in my belly, but she just figured that everyone, including her, had a baby in their belly. It wasn't until we brought Lexi home that she realized this thing was here to stay. And even then she wasn't all that involved in caring for Lexi. She would hold Lexi, but lost interest after a few seconds and really just wanted to play. It wasn't until Lexi was old enough to play with her that she really became interested in having a little sister. And now the two of them are thick as thieves. They play together all of the time and for the most part they get along. Stasa is the typical big sister and bosses Lexi around when they play and Lexi usually just goes along with whatever Stasa says. Of course they also fight like any siblings, but we've been letting them resolve their issues on their own.

This time people would ask Stasa and Lexi if they wanted a baby brother or a baby sister and Stasa would always say that she only wanted sisters. No matter how often we explained that the baby could be a brother or sister, she insisted that she could only have sisters, no brothers. Lexi never really seemed to care, but both girls were really into feeling the baby kick. And every night they would give my belly a kiss goodnight and would talk to the baby. Stasa was also full of questions during this pregnancy and was really interested in how the baby was going to get out of my belly. I explained how the baby would be born and every few days after that she would remind me how the baby would come out.

The day I packed my hospital bag she saw it in my room and had tons of questions about it and what it was for. When I explained that we would take it with us when we went to the hospital, she wanted to pack a bag for herself, too. It took quite a bit of explaining to get her to understand that she wouldn't be going to the hospital with us. Once she knew that Mimi was coming to stay with her, she was fine.

I worried a bit about when I would go into labor and if it would happen while they were at school, home and awake, or in the middle of the night. We talked to Stasa a lot about what would happen when it was time for the baby to come so she would be prepared if she woke up and we weren't at home. Turns out that's exactly what happened and apparently she woke up around 5:00 am looking for us.

After Tommy was born the girls were the first visitors we had - I really wanted them to meet their new brother before anyone else came around. They ran into the room, happy to see us and chomping at the bit to meet their new baby. We told them it was a baby brother and his name was Tommy and I kind of braced myself for the frowns about it being a boy, only to be met with huge smiles. They were beyond thrilled to have a brother and both immediately wanted to hold him and love on him. Stasa was interested in him and happy to hold him, but she was also happy to let Lexi and others take a turn holding him. Lexi, on the other hand, did not want to give him up once she started holding him. I think this picture explains exactly how she felt when she wasn't holding him.


I wasn't expecting Lexi to be all that interested in her new brother and thought she'd behave the way Stasa did when Lexi was born. I couldn't have been more wrong. Lexi is the most caring and attentive big sister this kid could have. Don't get me wrong, Stasa also loves Tommy and always gives him kisses goodnight and goodbye in the morning, but she's also happy to leave him be if he's sleeping or just hanging out. And she occasionally asks to hold him, but if I say no she's okay with that, too. Lexi insists on either holding Tommy or sitting next to him all of the time. When she wakes up in the morning, she runs out of her room and asks "where's Tommy?" and then beelines for our room to see him. No more snuggles with Mommy for her in the morning. She also likes to pick out his clothes every morning and likes to cover him with blankets and gives him the pacifier whether he's crying or not.

Both girls are getting into a new routine when they come home from school every day. They come in, take off their jackets and shoes and run to wash their hands (they're often reminded to do that) so they can love on Tommy. Stasa is fascinated by the way he looks around and how he grips her finger. She's content to sit next to him and look at his eyes. The other night I spent some extra time with her after stories and let her hold him for a bit. She just stared into his eyes and told me that Tommy has dark blue eyes and she and daddy have light blue eyes. She's mostly helpful and hasn't really lashed out like she did when Lexi was born. I think part of that is us working as hard as we can to keep both girls to the routine and schedule they're used to. Both girls have to be reminded more than once to do something, but if we add in that they can hold Tommy if they do X, Y, or Z they sprint to get it done. A little bribery never hurt anyone, did it? ; )

The girls have both surprised me with how loving and caring and gentle they are with Tommy. And both have been so generous with their favorite blankets and will cover him and place their own babies next to him. They're also very interested in how he eats and the other night both came down with their babies and said they needed to feed their babies "booby milk" and asked me to help them. I wanted to make them mini Boppys before the baby was born and never got around to it, but now that I know they're so interested in caring for their babies I think I'll make them sometime in the next week. Tommy is very blessed to have two loving big sisters and I feel more than blessed to have three beautiful and healthy kids.